Hello all. I know I said I would faithfully be posting on Wednesdays now, but we had no WiFi in my Pittsburgh house, and to be perfectly honest, I am way too lazy to carry this laptop somewhere where there's free WiFi seeing as I don't have a weightless little Mac. I could have posted on my iPhone, but seeing as it takes me about 15 minutes to compose a brief text message, it probably would have taken until now anyway. So I apologize, but please show some mercy.
I had this whole thing planned where I was gonna write about how I'm gonna be a wonderful, new little person with the new year, but then I thought...no I'm not. And regardless, that would be boring. So it was back to the drawing board...until I left for Pittsburgh.
Now...bear with me because the drive to Pittsburgh from Syracuse is seriously as boring as it sounds. Probably even more. It is long, dull, and you can only listen to "I Knew You Were Trouble" so many times before you actually consider pulling over to a rest stop parking lot and waiting to be abducted.
But for real...I can't tell you how many times I felt like rolling down the window and screaming "NO MATTER HOW CLOSE YOU DRIVE BEHIND ME, I AM NOT GOING TO DRIVE ANY FASTER THAN THIS." I drive an old Buick, the door doesn't close all the way, so the faster you go, the more wind you have blowing in your ear, and I've already had a foot in the grave once in my life. Not to mention I'm a law abiding citizen, god dammit!
So that pissed me off. And then of course, someone merging onto the thruway didn't yield because he was sending a text message. Now seriously. I don't mean to get all old woman preachy and PSA-like, but driving a car is like driving a huge, giant, death machine. And now that I have an iPhone like the rest of the freaking world, I know of its seductive charms. But seriously. Put it the f*** down when you're driving. It's not worth it. It's really not. And if you're expecting an important message, PULL THE HELL OVER.
Before I was diagnosed with cancer, I was learning to drive, and getting ready to schedule a road test and all that. But then when the shit hit the fan, I obviously stopped. No one likes a vomiting bitch in a Christine Daae wig driving a car on the highway. So when I finished chemo, I was an 18 year-old, stuck at home while her friends were in college and her family went back to school and work--and I was immobile. I was stuck at the house. My mom kept urging me and pushing me to get my license but after everything I'd gone through--I felt like learning to drive was just willingly putting myself back in harm's way. I didn't like the idea of having my own life and the lives of others at stake based upon my own judgement and driving and the driving of others. It seemed terrifying. It was like when my parents urged me to ask for a Disney cruise for my Make-A-Wish. I was like...exactly what I need: with the luck I've had, I'll beat cancer only to hit an ice berg or something, and die a watery death at the bottom of the Atlantic. Sounds great. But seriously--that's how scary driving felt to me.
But I needed to get out of the freaking house...so I did it. Reluctantly. It's amazing to me how eager and excited sixteen year-olds get about getting their license. They had to take me kicking and screaming to that road test. I'm still an apprehensive driver.
Fast forward to today, and not only have I had my bout with the C-word, but I've also had two tires pop while driving on a major highway, that sent me swerving into a ditch. Needless to say, I no longer drive faster than 65 miles an hour. I'm one of those people that you pass on the highway. I'm one of those people who won't answer or even look at messages while I'm driving. I'm one of those drivers who annoys the shit out of you. I also A) Don't get pulled over, and B) am somewhat safer in my car than a speed demon texting at the wheel.
In conclusion--remember that when you get into the driver's seat, you are taking on a HUGE responsibility to yourself and to others. As stupid and irritating as I am sounding to myself right now, please don't text and drive, please don't tailgate, and please don't drive ridiculously faster than the speed limit. (And if you have ever even THOUGHT of drinking and driving, I don't even want you reading my effing blog).
Don't be selfish. Drive safely.
<3Jesse
PS>>>Wednesday there'll be a guest post by my friend Mike Mort, and you can find my writing this Monday on his blog http://www.manmythmike.blogspot.com/
Just a little experiment we're doing to vary our readers!
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